In my last post, I covered the issues of impulse buying, retail therapy, and the need for a financial advisor and/or buddy. Everything I said was true and applies to everyone, especially ADHDers, and in particular, me.
My spouse, SIL, and I went to a convention this past weekend. There was only one vendor I wanted to stop at and pick up a couple of things. The seller makes geeky leggings, loungers, joggers, shorts, skirts, and more. I planned on getting one item, a pair of loungers in a Sailor Moon print. They did not have the one I wanted in stock, so I looked at other items. I literally bought something/s from them every single day. I now have three skirts and two loungers that I'm in love with. But... I am also now broke. Again.
Granted, saving up for things like conventions is a good thing to do, which I actually did. I just didn't expect to end up spending quite as much as I did. I justified it with, "What they have, they have; once they're gone, you're screwed," so I got what I really loved and to hell with it.
Except that I now have to pay down my credit card again. It's something I can do, it just leaves me a bit on the penny-pinching side of things for a few weeks.
So even when you have a financial advisor/buddy, sometimes you're going to screw up and go nuts. The trick to this is to acknowledge that you did the thing (spending too much), analyze why you did the thing (impulse-shopping, mental health, justification), and come up with a strategy that keeps you from doing the thing again. My partner and I typically run $100+ purchases by each other, and smaller ones if they're cumulative.
Part of my issue this past weekend was that the items I got were $40 or less a piece, I just got several over the course of several days, and didn't add it up until the deed was done. The other part was that the shop did not put out same patterns every day. Saturday had slightly different inventory than Friday, same on Sunday. So I found something new to get each day, having not seen it before. And while $40 isn't terrible, when you multiply it by nine, it turns into a lot, and definitely over my allowed con budget.
Do I regret anything? Yes, and no. I regret not doing mental/calculator math while I was in purchase-mode. I pretty much lost all self-restraint (again, because they are popular and sell out fast). That justification does not make it any better though. I had a budget and I should have stuck with it. So yes, I regret overspending. I did not do Future-Me any favors.
But also no, because I got some really cute things to wear, the skirts I can wear at the office, so in that sense, I don't feel as bad.
What's surprising, though very nice, is that my self-disgust hasn't reared its ugly head. I don't hate myself for overspending, not like I used to. I'm not in full on panic mode because I do still have a savings buffer, so the sky is not falling. I am not unappreciative of this feeling, it's just... odd. I've never really felt this before, this sense of "okay-ness" of having overspent; in the past, it's always been a "Holy shit, I effed this up, how am I going to feed myself the next two weeks?" situation.
I guess my point with all of this is that having my financial buddy (spouse) really IS helping me. I may have overspent, but not to the point of financial straits. I will recover by my next paycheck, which will go directly into savings. And in the meantime, if I need anything, I'll run it by him first.